Episode Eight — The Robbery 2 (season finale)
Continued from The Robbery 1
Momsi: Please mama forgive them.
Robber2: Please mama! We are your children oh. Forgive us.
Grandma: G forbid! My children will never do this rubbish.
Robber1: Mama, please just tell us what we can do for you to forgive us.
Grandma: There’s nothing oh. Just do what you wanted to do because whether you do it or not, the curse will still affect you.
Momsi: Mama, please na. Just forgive them. Let them go.
Grandma: No way.
Robber3: Ah mama please. We’ll do anything.
Robber1: Yes mama. Anything.
Well she better not tell them to come and sleep with her oh.
Grandma: Fine. We were about to clean the whole house before you boys came in and have already wasted our time. So if you want me to remove the curse, you’ll have to do everything.
Robber2: We’ll do everything.
What? I love you Grandma!
They were guys of their words. They did all our chores. They did the dishes, swept the house, combed the cobwebs, mopped the floor, polished the furniture, ironed our clothes, made the beds, hand-washed all the dirty clothes and curtains, etc. And they did it fast and happily.
Robber1: (talking to momsi) Mama, this kitchen tap is leaking.
Momsi: Yes. I called the plumber and he said he travelled.
Robber3: Let me fix it.
Momsi: No need.
Robber3: I insist.
Momsi: Can you even fix it?
Robber3: Yes ma. I’m a plumber.
So momsi gave the guy money and the guy left. I thought he would not come back, but the guy came back, gave momsi her change and fixed the tap without charging for it. And yes, Robber1 treated the fowl f**k up. Not as the fowl had wanted sha. He killed and skinned the fowl and prepared it for cooling.
Xmas Fowl: No! no!! Don’t kill me. Ra-pe me instead. I don’t want to die a virgin. Somebody help!!!
By evening, they were done and did a perfect job. The house was fragrant and sparkling clean like never before.
Grandma: Good children. I’ve forgiven you. The curse will not follow you again. Don’t steal again oh.
Robber2: Yes mama. We won’t steal till we die.
Robber1 and Robber3: Yes mama.
Robber3: Mama, bless us too oh.
Grandma: Ok. Good things and favor will follow you. You will see 2020 and more years.
Robber1, Robber2 and Robber3: Amen! Thank you mama. We love you.
Yea, maybe I’ll fulfill that prayer by employing one of them in my future company as cleaners. What!? They’re professionals.
Anyway, momsi forced 20k into their hands and they thanked her and wished us happy new year in advance. Rita and Juliet even hugged them goodbye.
Be careful ladies. Don’t go and press the wrong buttons and turn them on. Girls! You can never understand them.
Popsi and Samson started ranting with furry when the incident was narrated to them. Like whatever. Who said having an old woman in the house won’t come in handy? And if you’re wondering if there was really a charm under granny’s bed. Well, there was only a bible written in our native language there.
So yep, we got robbed…. Of our end of year chores. Lol.