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Martins Diaries 2: Episode Four

For those who have been following this serie, I’m sorry for going AWOL since the last update. Been preoccupied since the last update. Anyways, I’m back and ain’t going nowhere till this season is completed. So brace yourselves while we begin.


Episode Four — Hospitalized

Have I told you about the time I had an accident? It was a wheelbarow accident! It’s embarrassing I know.

I was jejely walking on my own, when this dude came from a blind end and ran the damn thing into me. And he was carrying 3 gallons of water in it. Everything crashed into me! Men I’ve heard of wheelbarrow accidents but never knew it was real. It was excruciating!

Guy: OMG! Please I’m sorry.

Me: (shrieking) Call my momsi!

Guy: Em, are you with your phone?

Me: Can’t you use yours? Let me give you her number.

Guy: My phone is at home.

I looked at him, he was wearing only boxers “publicly”. Has he no shame?

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So I took out my phone and gave it to him.

Guy: What’s the password?

We naija guys and passwords! We’re 5 and 6!! Nearly every naija guy use password on his phone. Don’t ask me why cuz if you ask me, na who I go ask?

Me: Give it to me, let me unlock it.

Well, you don’t expect me to give a total stranger my password, do you?

The guy just tried to kill me you know. He may abscond with my phone immediately I spilled the password. I had to defy the pain. I’ve got too many important stuffs on my phone to lose it.

I dialed momsi number and gave the guy the phone.

Guy: Hel-he-llo ma, g-g-good day ma.

Good?! Good?!! Did he just say good day?!!! He has the woman son crouching in agony and he’s telling her Good day?!!!!

Guy: Em, I, your son, I em…acc…em…

What’s this? Morse code? Wait oh! It’s not enough that he’s hurt me, now he wants to kill my momsi as well with all these suspense? Or don’t he watch movies? He should know how to break a sad news without adding more drama.

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Me: (shouting) Tell her what happened na! Or do you want to give her a heart attack? Abi you want me to die first?

He managed to report the incident to momsi and within five minutes, her SUV was packed in front of us. Samson had driven it.

Men, momsi was so hysterical even I thought I was dead.

Samson, Richie and the guy carried me into the back seat.

Me: Wait!

Samson: What?

Me: My phone!

You didn’t think I was gonna forget it with him? Did you? Hell no!

Isaac followed the guy to know his house, just in case, while momsi, Samson and Richie rushed me to a nearby hospital.

I was attended to and given painkillers. The doctor said I had to be admitted for a day or two. So I ended up getting hospitalized.

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I dreaded hospitals but with the fine and nice student nurse Christabel, tending to me, I didn’t mind.

Alas! the rest of the family came to the hospital to visit me, “the poor wheelbarrow accident victim.”

It couldn’t get any worse than this.

Pastor Friyo: Let’s us pray for him.

Say what? I take it back. It could get worse.

Him?! Pray for me?!! Please no, please no, somebody should please say no!!!

Everybody stood up for the prayer and Kelvin and Isaac started winking at me.

Somebody please press mute!

To be continued…

Until next week.


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